This story is set about ten years before main Mercverse canon, insofar as this AU can be said to have any canon. :-) So. "Two Guys and a Girl," in which I bend, staple, and otherwise mutilate normal game canon involving trips to Nibelheim, because seriously, what's the point of crack AUs if you can't play around like this?
You know, that wasn't quite how I thought that meeting/conversation would go, but once I got past the initial 200-500 words, the scene more or less wrote itself. And it does give me a lot of interesting stuff to play around with in chapter 9, so I think, all in all, it worked out.